If you’ve been through a challenging time in your life, you’ll know that it can take a while for you to heal. Even if the immediate crisis or threat is over, the body and mind take time to adjust. The death of a loved one, a sudden job loss, or a season of burnout can all leave their mark.
When everything falls apart, it can be tempting to go to a dark place and give up, but many have been through similar situations and found paths through. Of course, when you are going through a situation like this, you can wonder to yourself how the rest of the world can continue as normal. People are partying, buying groceries, and doing all the things they normally do, which can leave you feeling like you are left out in the cold.
Here is how you can navigate the storm. Here’s a realistic roadmap you can follow if you are going through a challenging time right now.
Get rid of the idea that there’s a quick fix
If you have the idea in your head right now that there’s a quick fix to whatever problem you’re going through, push it to one side. Usually, solutions take a lot of time and planning. One problem is that well-meaning people often tell you to look on the bright side, but that can sometimes be psychologically impossible.
What often needs to happen is a period of relaxation and restoration. Looking on the bright side can change your perspective, but there are also physiological components to getting better and finding a long-term, sustainable solution. There is usually no shortcut through grief, anger, and profound disappointment. Sometimes throwing yourself into something you can work on can help, but it depends on your personality, and you have to be careful.
Usually, the best approach is to accept how things are now, recognise them for what they are, and then move forward.
Focus on the basics
When you’re going through a really difficult time like this, it can be very helpful to focus on the basics. When your emotions are on fire, it can be difficult to do anything, let alone all of the normal activities that modern life demands. Grief and stress are physically exhausting, and they can affect sleep.
For this reason, it’s a good idea to prioritise rest where possible. Sleeping at night can be challenging in these times, but it’s also useful to rest during the day if that helps.
In terms of nutrition, you might lose your appetite when you’re going through a difficult episode like this. Again, that’s completely normal. If a regular meal is too much, opt for soups and eat more frequently throughout the day. If you want to try eating your favourite foods, then do so. This is the time to do it.
If there are substances involved and you’re struggling to heal because of a prior prescription, then you may want to look at rehab. A suboxone clinic or something similar can be helpful.
Write it out
Another thing you can try is to write it out. If your thoughts and feelings are stuck in your head, it can bottle things up. Writing it down on paper has been shown time and time again to make a real difference to how people feel when going through a similar situation to you.
If you can, journal or write your experiences up in a text document on your computer. That’s useful. If you need to scribble things out or write them several times, then do so. This isn’t something you are going to publish in a magazine or on a newspaper website. It’s just for you personally.
Another thing to watch out for is how you talk to yourself. Pay attention to your inner monologue. Sometimes it can betray you. If you are calling yourself a bad person, then that can make the experience even more difficult.
The best approach is to treat yourself how a best friend might treat you. If you can be kind to yourself in the way that someone who loves you would be kind to you, then it can make a tremendous difference because you’re not working against yourself.
Rebuild one step at a time
You’ve often heard the cliche that it’s a good idea to take one step at a time. Even ancient philosophers have said that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Because of this, it’s a good idea to give yourself micro-goals. Having small things that you work towards at the beginning will allow you to do more towards the end. Try to avoid grandiose planning if you can. Usually, your progress won’t be a straight line; it will be jagged. Some days you’ll be up, and others you’ll be down, especially if you’re healing from a traumatic experience. Micro-goals can include things like:
- taking a 10-minute walk outside
- making yourself a healthy breakfast
During these periods, it’s critical to seek connection. If you have depression or trauma, it can thrive in isolation. Reach out to people you trust, or even pay a licensed therapist or professional to talk to you if necessary.
Also, find anchors in your day. If there are some low-effort routines you can revolve around, that’s often extremely useful and grounds you.
Moving forward
Finally, it’s time to think about moving forward, but you’ll want to do so in a changed way. No matter what your plans were before your health crisis or traumatic event, they’re probably different after it. Getting better doesn’t mean erasing or forgetting about the past or what happened. If you can get to that stage, it may be helpful for you. What it usually means is incorporating the things that have happened into the larger story of who you are. Sometimes you can find that old endings become new beginnings.
For many people, after sufficient time has passed, they wake up and realise that the old weight that was weighing on them has lifted.
The owners and authors of Cinnamon Hollow are not doctors and this is in no way intended to be used as medical advice. We cannot be held responsible for your results. As with any product, service or supplement, use at your own risk. Always do your own research and consult with your personal physician before using.
