Think You’ve Found Your Biological Father? Here Are Your Next Steps

It’s always going to be a big moment when you feel like you have finally found your biological father. Some people can go their whole lives without ever knowing who their real dad is. There’s no age limit on making this discovery. It is an exciting moment, but it can also feel completely overwhelming. You’re standing on the threshold of a moment that could change your life completely. You are going to have a lot of questions for them. You’re also going to be hoping that they will have a lot of questions for you too.

It’s also a time that there isn’t really an exact blueprint for. Everyone’s feelings about this situation will be different, and you can’t bet on how the person that you’re approaching is going to react. You can feel a little frozen at moments like this. But there are some simple, essential guidelines that you should follow if you want to give yourself the best chance of things going the way that you hoped they would.

Keep Your Expectations Low

First of all, it’s important not to get carried away. The last thing that you’d want is to get your hopes up only to have them dashed when you discover that the person you think is your father is just another stranger. It’s also important to remember that the person that you find may not be the kind of person that you hoped they would be. This needs to be something that you’re doing for yourself, which brings us to our next point.

Remember Who You’re Doing This For

It’s perfectly understandable that you would want to find and meet your biological father. However, sometimes it’s easy for feelings and motivations to get a little bit muddled. Don’t just go through with this process if it starts to feel like you’ve forgotten why you’re doing it in the first place. This is a huge emotional process to put yourself through, so your feelings need to be your main focus. Emotions can become particularly complex if your father turns out to not feel the same way about this discovery as you do.

Make Sure With A DNA Test

There is a lot of homework that you can do before you reach the DNA test stage. You can talk to relatives about their memories of family history. You can compare old photographs to find a likeness. In fact, it’s easier than ever to do a big part of your investigation online. However, the best way to know for sure whether the person you’re looking at is really your father is with a DNA test. It may not be the easiest conversation to bring up (more on that in just a moment), but it is absolutely crucial if you want to have a definitive answer. The process has been made much easier, however, by home paternity tests. A home paternity test can be done very quickly, and you can send the samples off to be tested. AlphaBiolabs can have your tests back to you in just three days.

Think Carefully About How To Talk To Them

Everyone has their own personal history. You can never know what someone else is going through, and it’s so important to think about how your actions may impact not only the person that you’re approaching but their family. You shouldn’t let worries about upsetting people put you off tracking down your real father, but it always pays to be a little bit sensitive about how you engage them. Remember that they may have no idea that they were even a father, and they may have family members that could be upset by this news. It’s always best to approach them directly first instead of contacting any of their relatives.

Be Wary Of Scams

It’s a shame to have to say it, but if someone has approached you online claiming that they have some information about your father, then you need to think very carefully before continuing. Most people are smart enough to spot a scam when they see one, but cybercriminals and scammers are getting smarter and smarter with attack numbers going up and up. Be wary of anyone who claims to have information that you have not approached previously. Remember not to click any links and be especially dubious if they want money from you.

Remember To Pace Yourself

It’s important to take things slowly even if everything goes well. Your father may be thrilled that you have found them and want to spend a lot of time together. But there is a lot of history and a lot of emotional baggage that may not be easy to shake, even if you want to. You could think about limiting the amount of time that you spend with each other and introducing each other’s families slowly, for example.