Human beings all have a built-in instinct to share their lives with others. We are drawn to our prospective partner by an indefinable, invisible web that has the ability to consume us. The feeling of belonging, sharing and communicating is very important to humans. However, many cannot open up to their partners and they keep problems and worries bottled inside, leading to the first crack in the breakdown of a relationship.
Once one of the partners discovers the other has been ‘living a separate life’ by furtive actions and taking part in undisclosed activities, jealousy and suspicion creep into the relationship. Reasons for keeping problems to yourself can be fear of failure, letting a partner down, or trying to prevent hurting them. Whatever the motive, it can be the first step to destroying your partner’s trust and generating a feeling of betrayal
The reason for concealing your actions might be something as simple as a worrying medical problem or an expected promotion that did not take place. But for others, it might be something more serious. Drug and alcohol addiction can play a large part in people keeping secrets. What began as a remedy to alleviate a stressful lifestyle can turn into a serious problem. Preventing your family and friends from learning about your addiction becomes a compulsion, and until you admit to yourself that you have a problem, the healing process cannot begin. To seek help, contact one of the many organizations trained to counsel and treat this type of abuse. You might want to consider www.harrishousestl.org. They will be able to answer the questions you have at this time.
Interacting with children of all ages is essential. Teaching them to look after and care for pets is a good way for them to share their love and prepare them for situations later in life. If they are left to their own devices and don’t feel embroiled in a loving environment, their solitary existence generally continues into their adult psyche. If they were deprived of childhood companionship, became used to their own company, and never had the opportunity to share their experiences and dreams with another, they might end up entering an adult relationship with the same chip on their shoulder.
Communication with friends, family, your children, and most of all your partner, is one of the most important things in life. We all have a deep-down desire to belong, but we cannot do that without sharing the good times as well as the bad. No matter how hard it is to admit defeat or to confess to a stupid deed, without the ability to discuss problems and face predicaments together, any relationship is doomed.
Finding out your child, friend, or partner has kept a multitude of secrets and important decisions from you is distressing. Confronting them with your discoveries might lead to them lying, breaking promises, and stressful arguments. Lack of communication is one of the main causes of the breakdown in many relationships. Not everyone realizes the importance of sharing the bad times as well as the good ones, or even just revealing silly little everyday happenings.
As with any crisis, referral to a professional counselor or therapist might be the answer. A deep-seated issue locked in someone’s subconscious might be preventing them from doing what seems natural to others. For as long as they can remember, they have always had themselves to consider, but now there is another person, and removing that selfish streak and getting to the bottom of their fears and frustrations is a job for a professional.
However, most of us learn to adapt to changes in our lives as we meet new friends and new partners. Sometimes love changes a person’s perspective and creates the need to confide and share our thoughts, our deeds, and our life with one another. This is the healthiest approach to a relationship. Having another person witness events in our lives and contributing to making their life better and more loving is the goal of most. So the next time you do something stupid or have a wild, reckless notion, tell your loved one. You may end up laughing about it.